Moving to a new home can be stressful, doubly so if you’re a child and especially if you’re transitioning through a divorce. Your child’s bedroom is their sanctuary, their safe place, a place to relax, retreat and recharge their batteries during anxious situations. Creating a safe, cozy and inviting bedroom can help your child look forward to spending time in your home, rather than dreading the stress of travelling between two houses.

Include Your Child in the Process

When it comes to matters of child custody, your kid might be feeling pretty powerless. A lot has changed and they haven’t had much, if any, say in how it all plays out. Including your child in the process of setting up their new room can give them control over part of the situation. It can also make them feel like the space truly is their own — rather than just a room mom or dad haphazardly slapped together to house them while they visit.

Depending on your lease, you may be able to let them choose paint colors for their room. If not, customizing the space with linens, posters, art and decor can all go a long way in giving your child’s room the feel of being home. You can also find inexpensive decals online at places like

Establish Boundaries and Privacy Expectations

Even young kids need privacy sometimes, and their room is the space for that. When you’re setting up your child’s bedroom, have a talk about privacy and boundaries. Be sure to listen to your child’s needs in addition to laying out your expectations. Things like when the door can and can’t be shut — for example, when your child has friends over — or when it’s okay to enter without knocking or even whether or why you’ll enter their room when they aren’t present are all things to address. Initiating this conversation and keeping it as an open dialogue establishes trust between you and your child as you transition into being a single parent and can eliminate the anxiety of the unknown.

Personal Touches Make a Difference

Even if there’s tension between you and your former partner, your child probably misses them when they’re at your home (and vice versa!). While it may be hard for you to see reminders of your ex, these items can be sources of comfort for your child. Personal touches like family pictures, stuffed animals given to them by the other parent or a special blanket can make your child’s new bedroom feel more welcoming, comforting and inviting. If you can’t quite bear to see reminders of your former spouse just yet, consider a special box that your child can stow these items in to retrieve when they need a little extra comfort.

Don’t Forget Function

In working to create a soothing, cozy space for your child’s bedroom, it can be easy to forget function. Work in space for their hobbies and likes to make the room more inviting and useful. For example, if you have a teenager who plays hockey, create a space for them to store their equipment in their closet. If you’ve got a crafter, setting up an art table can cut down on clutter and mess while giving them the space to create.

Integrating function into the form of your child’s bedroom shows them you know and care about their passions and activities. A desk for homework, for example, might not be the most fun piece of furniture in your kid’s room, but it equips them for academic success.

Creating a Bedroom Your Child Will Love

Your attitude in setting up your child’s new bedroom can help set the tone for how they view the room. If you view it as a chore or take the task as just one more thing on your to-do list, your child probably won’t see it as the safe, cozy sanctuary it should be. Letting them keep personal touches like family photos or helping create the space by picking out curtains or bed linens can go a long way in setting up a new room that your child loves to come home to — as opposed to feeling like a guest in what should be their house, too.

Transitioning after a divorce can be hard on you and your family, but you can help your children adjust by giving them things they’re excited to come home to, like their own private space.  

At Rodríguez Family Law, we’ve helped lots of people navigate the road from marriage to single parenthood, we can help you, too! Give us a call today at 862-241-1228 or you can send us an email. We’re here to help.