Social media is a great way to keep up with friends and family and it’s tempting to share everything great going on in your life. Some things, however, are better left offline and away from prying eyes, especially if you’re a newly divorced parent who has recently started dating.

Social Media Drama and Your Dating Life


When it comes to being newly single and dating, it’s best to keep any trace of your love life offline. Not only do you not want to provide amusement to the lookie-lous or reason to worry for the two-faced “friends” you may have acquired, but what you post online is forever — and as you recently learned, even the things you think will last for a lifetime might not. Save yourself future embarrassment and leave the gushing about your new beau to your diary, your coffee date with your BFF or your weekly phone chat with your mom (or therapist!)

Even if you’re not worried about the information trail you’re leaving behind for the sake of your reputation, any alimony you might be receiving could be affected by what you say or do online.  You’re suddenly under heightened scrutiny when you’re divorced with alimony or child custody, remember that people who may want to challenge that alimony or custody are always watching for information that can help their case.

When it comes to being newly single and dating, it’s best to keep any trace of your love life offline. Not only do you not want to provide amusement to the lookie-lous or reason to worry for the two-faced “friends” you may have acquired, but what you post online is forever — and as you recently learned, even the things you think will last for a lifetime might not. Save yourself future embarrassment and leave the gushing about your new beau to your diary, your coffee date with your BFF or your weekly phone chat with your mom (or therapist!)

Even if you’re not worried about the information trail you’re leaving behind for the sake of your reputation, any alimony you might be receiving could be affected by what you say or do online.  You’re suddenly under heightened scrutiny when you’re divorced with alimony or child custody, remember that people who may want to challenge that alimony or custody are always watching for information that can help their case.

Dating Gets Tricky With Kids – Especially With Social Media


Dating after divorce is murky territory when you have kids. As you adjust to life as a single parent, your kids are adjusting to a new family structure and still trying to figure out how to navigate their relationship with the other parent (or possibly how to adjust to not having regular contact with your former spouse.)

When you post the details of your dating life on social media, there’s no guarantee that word won’t get back to your kids. And if you’re just testing the waters, aren’t quite ready to introduce your new partner to your kids or have decided to keep the news of your dating under wraps while they cope with the huge changes in their lives,  someone spilling the beans can complicate things.

All it takes is one well meaning friend or family member to ask your kids about the new flame in your life to breed mistrust from your kids. Even if you’re of the mind that your dating life is none of your children’s concern, there’s a potential for them to resent you telling the world at large first, rather than them. Instead of creating a family crisis you don’t need, opt not to post sensitive things about your dating life on social media.

Prepare to Be Judged and Have Assumptions Made


People make judgements and assumptions all the time, even if they don’t express them. Rather than subject yourself to harsh or critical judgements from your online circle or erroneous assumptions, keep the details of your dating life private.

Say, for example, you post about how madly in love you are with your new dating partner. Anyone in your online circle who thinks its too soon for you to be dating — let alone “madly in love” — may assume you were seeing your partner prior to your divorce. Others may assume you’re losing sight of your kids in favor of pursuing a new romance.

And while the opinion of others online should, in theory, not matter even one little bit, those conclusions made from social media posts can have very real repercussions on your real life. A family member who thinks it’s too soon, for example, may opt to forgo babysitting once it comes out that you’re using the time without your kids to go on a date. Your new partner may even feel too much pressure on their newly forged relationship with you after being displayed online for your friends and family to see — dooming the relationship before it ever really gets off the ground.

When you put your personal and private life on display — even if you have your social media locked down to viewable by “friends only” — you’re putting it out there for the world to see.  When it comes to social media and protecting your privacy, use this rule of thumb: if you wouldn’t want it being seen by your kids, don’t post it online.

Oh, and if you’re dating and spending a lot of time at one another’s homes, even if you’re not really living together, this may have a huge impact on any alimony you’re receiving, including being terminated entirely.

It’s Okay to Share Your Happiness


Make no mistake, it’s okay to share your happiness with those on your social media. But posting about your dating life as a newly divorced parent is, unfortunately, opening the door for unnecessary drama and hassles.

So go ahead and mention that you’re doing better in your post-divorce days, that you’re finding your happiness or “getting your groove back” and focusing on you, your needs and your family, but leave the details of your dating life mum. After all, that’s a personal matter and even with the best privacy settings in the world, nothing remains private and personal when put online.

Remember that you’re going to be under a magnifying glass during, and even after, your divorce.  If you have children or are receiving alimony, that goes double. So before you get too serious with a new partner, consult your attorney.  There can be serious ramifications, including the loss of alimony, if you’re not careful.

At Rodríguez Family Law, we know you want to move on with your life after divorce.  We’re here to help you make that transition without causing yourself economic damage. Before you commit to another relationship, we’re happy to explain the potential ramifications. Give us a call today at 862-241-1228 or you can send us an email. We’re here to help.